How many times do we say to ourselves, “I wish my life had more joy in it?”
What we do not realize is that joy arrives in our life through the flow of connection to a power that must flow through us to be experienced as joy. Here’s what I mean be that. In any one day, we may have a whole host of experiences that make us “feel stuck.” This is the terminology we use. But why then do we never look at the antidote to the stuck-ness we experience as flow?
When we want joy in our lives, we often decide to remain stuck inwardly and ask someone to help us out of it. We might say, “I’m having a hard time with something. Will you help me to work it out?” What can happen as we communicate our woeful place of disconnection with the flow is that we surrender our upset of it as a block to our power flow for long enough that a change in flow can occur. What might be more accessible to us in any moment as well as enjoyable for those around us is to take a moment to move our stuck places out of our inner world by focusing on our relationship with the inner reality of breath and flow. Then we create a more joyful mind to connect with our loved ones. The benefit of doing this is not to avoid the problem, but rather to have enough mind power to understand what created the experience in the first place.
Let me give you another example. Let’s say your husband has just come home from work and he has had a very difficult time with a coworker in the office. You are hoping that he will want to spend some time with you because you have been looking forward to seeing him all day. When he dismisses connecting with you and your desire for him to share about his day saying, “Not now honey, I need to sit with the paper a bit.” You automatically make assumptions that you are the cause of his discontent, when in fact, he is aiming to give you his more loving attention after he has recovered his flow.
We have undervalued our relationship with this inner flow of joy over many years of misinterpretations over the simplicity that it brings into our experience. We say, “that’s too boring. What could a few moments of flow recovery time possibly provide?” To this, I would say, reunification with all of the outcomes for joy and connection that you really want.
The next time you “feel stuck” remember inward flow is the antidote. Close your eyes and see the flow of love moving the boulders of your mind down the proverbial stream. When you mend the inner flow, you can experience the joy of living from a place of joy once again. You may decide to find a more active and connected expression of exuberance when you feel reconnected with your benevolent flow of joy.
What can we do when our loved one wants our attention and has a less than positive attitude about their predicament? We can encourage them to reconnect to their joy for a brief couple of relaxing breaths together with you to start moving things in the direction they want to go. You may want to tell your loved one beforehand that you intend to encourage them to flow when you feel that they could use more joy, so they understand that your loving suggestion has the value it truly holds to return this possibility to them in difficult moments. Without some prior experience with the simplicity yet incredible influence it holds to enjoy life again, it may seem as though you are unloving to suggest such a thing.
However, this simple act has the power to help us to find our best self in the worst of times. Practiced regularly, deeply and sincerely, you will never again lose your connection with joy itself.
Joyfully yours,
Katherine Blake Tomasson a.k.a. Kate